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Writer's pictureMissTinks

Making Personal Development... Personal



This blog post is for anyone currently feeling a little adrift from their desired realities. What I mean by that is, if you feel a bit disconnected from what you envisage is your 'big picture', then this post might just help you feel more aligned within the world.


In the Academy, we are spending the rest of the year focusing on what goals we want to achieve - goals that are just for us! It's a bit like considering what you would do with yourself if anything was possible; real big picture stuff. I wanted to share some of my teaching points with you today in the hope it gives you a better sense of direction and motivation to keep building the pathway to your big picture.


Learning Your Legacy

We'll start with shaping the big picture first. Below are a few questions I asked my Academy members in order to help them shape their big picture lifestyle.


  • If time were no limit and you could devote your hours to whatever you wanted, how would you fill your time?

  • If you could turn your hand to anything and your skillset was limitless, what would you master?

  • If money were no object, what would you own, where would you live, what would you do?


Any responses to those questions will more than likely stem from a deep-set urge or longing within you that aligns with your values. It might be that you want to help others in any way possible as you value your sense of purpose, responsibility and your relationships. It might be that you want to earn a lot of money and have financial freedom as you'd be the first in your family to achieve this and you want provide for them. Whatever it might be, it will align with your truest values.


Usually during this realisation, it will hit you just how big and scary these goals are. What you often also encounter at the point that you start to tell others about your plans is a number of people (unfortunately, often your nearest and dearest) who will put your goals down or even ridicule them.


I can't tell you the number of people who laughed at me for having a goal of buying a specific car because they don't understand my passion for cars and why I'd want a certain one in the first place. When I tell them that my next 'big car' is a Mustang, some still laugh!


The unfortunate reality of 'shooting for the stars' is that the majority of people either won't understand your aims or may even ridicule them because they simply haven't found what they want to aim for themselves, or they have tried and failed and were hurt by the experience. I like to call these failures 'false starts'. They occur for a number of reasons and if you view them as a teaching point rather than a failure, they will continue to move you forward rather than holding you back.


False Starts

Many of the situations we end up in when our plans fall short will stem from the following reasons:


  • A deep, instilled fear of failure means you never really get started

  • Your goal is unrealistic in comparison to the time, money or skills you have available

  • You are aiming for the goal because it's what someone else wants for you or what everyone else is doing

  • Your action steps aren't specific or efficient enough and the lack of progress de-motivates you


Sound familiar?


Once you have an idea of what the big picture looks like, you should devote the same amount of time to researching a few key things I'll list below which will help you get off to the right start. The main thing to remember is you won't need to know what the whole journey looks like, but knowing the first few steps is essential.


Moving Forward

These would be my next few ticks on the to-do-list once I knew what I really wanted to achieve in my life.


  1. Find someone or a few people who are already doing it and watch carefully. Ask them for advice if you are able to. If they are influencers in the field, follow them on social media and learn what you can.

  2. Find yourself some cheerleaders who will have your back. The unfortunate reality of this pursuit is you are likely to get more support from total strangers than you are from your friends and family, so a group or network of people aiming for the same thing will provide you with the motivation to keep going.

  3. Research, research, research! Ignite your passions and learn as much as you can about it, become an expert theoretically and look at ways you can carry it out physically.

  4. Speak to as many people as you can about it - it's not what you know, it's who! You never know who has connections that might be able to set up some opportunities for you.

  5. Gradually add in desired habits. You will begin to notice that there are probably numerous things you need to be doing every day to achieve your goal. Adding them gradually into your daily routine will help with achieving your goal.

  6. Take the steps! It's time! Whatever that first natural step might be, you are ready to take it. You have a good understanding of the skills, you have your cheerleaders, your motivation and a good understanding of what it takes to get going. All of this should prevent a false start.


A Worked Example: Running

Here's a game plan I put together for an Academy client who had run previously before changing jobs and relocating. He wanted to get back into it, but expand into marathon and long-distance running.


Step One, Two and Four: Find and follow popular runners on social media and ask around if there is someone in your wider social circle who runs. Ask in local Facebook groups about any running clubs or meets.


Step Three: Download any apps that might help (like Couch to 5K for example), read some articles online about pre and post-running, any essential equipment or top tips.


Step Five: Begin taking daily supplements that will aid your energy and recovery. Add in stretches first thing in the morning to increase your general flexibility. Drink more water to help with dehydration. Establish a healthy sleep routine to help build consistent energy. Anything you can be doing to increase your body's strength will be helpful.


Step Six: Get out there and run!


There are a lot of ways to achieve your goals and no 'one size fits all' approach. If there is anything I want you to take away from this, it's that your journey will be utterly unique to you, there won't always be a right or wrong way, and that there will ALWAYS be people who don't understand what you want to achieve in your life.


If you have found benefit in this blog post, you should consider joining the Believe Academy. It's an online Facebook group for adults with four livestreams per week - some more presentation focused and others group interactions. The content is based on many of the ideas I've written about here. There's also lots of benefits like shop discounts, first hand content and discounted and free events, and even an opportunity for 1:1 coaching.


Drop me an email if you'd like to know more!


Miss Tinks X





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